I’ve always thought a random stream of consciousness post about what I was thinking during a race would be much more interesting than a race re-cap.
The thing about stream of consciousness is that not all thoughts that go through one’s head are nice. It depends on the person, but I’m guessing most people have a mix of friendly and not so friendly thoughts. I’m human that way.
So, here are some random thoughts that went through my head aka kept me entertained along the 13.1 mile course.
1) The tall blond wearing pink in front of me has the most beautiful legs I have ever seen.
2) Why is she even in my corral? She looks like she’s so much faster…
3) I feel like shit. I’m going to suck today.
4) I’m going to be lucky to hit 2:30 today…this sucks. I was hoping to do another PR.
5) I wonder what it’s like to be fast..I wonder if I’ll even ever get to the point where I’m in the “fast” corral…
6) Yep, here we go. Okay, mister announcer…we can’t all be “The best looking corral.” You’ve said that now to every corral so far…give it a rest.
7) Okay…this sucks…I’m so stiff…
8) Aww…how awesome is that!? That girl is such a cutie! I love to see kids in races.
9) Why in the hell are you walking already? If you’re going to start the race with walking, at least start in the back of the corral! Or better yet, in the last corral. Seriously.
10) Speaking of walking, do we really need to walk 4 abreast?
11) That girl in front of me should not be in racing flats. She’s asking for an injury. That right foot…she’s running on a collapsed arch…
12) What is in that girl’s skirt? How can she run like that? It looks like a giant jewelry box bouncing up and down on her butt…that bouncing would bug me to no end…
13) Must keep up with box butt girl…
14) WIND! Holy shit that’s some wind. Not cool, wind.
15) Okay, looking for a tall, big dude for some drafting action…where are you, large runner guy? There you are…don’t mind me running right behind you…
16) Oh wow, there’s Tall Blond in Pink. She’s only 10 feet in front of me. Why is that?
17) Oh hells bells, I suck. My Garmin is all screwed up. I can’t believe I was idiot enough to stop it during the water stop-and forget to restart it. Now I have NO FRIGGIN CLUE what my real overall pace is.
18) Seriously, wind? SERIOUSLY? Oh goodie-rain, too?
19) I now have an official opinion on patterned running tights. They make everyone’s ass look bigger than it is. Note to self- never buy patterned running tights. My ass doesn’t need any help looking bigger, and it’s probably my best feature. Cute in the store, not cute on any runner I have seen. These are cute women, whose butt and thighs look bigger because of those pants. Nope. No way. No how. Never.
20) Oh, another DJ…playing the same song the last DJ was playing…
21) Why do all the DJs have to play the same 3 songs?
22) Oh shit oh shit OH SHIT my knee/leg. What the hell? What do I do, what do I do, what do I do…okay…stop and walk…okay no I’m not walking this. Screw it….okay I’ll stretch it. Stretch it…count to 60…and go. Losing a minute from my overall time here…
23) DAMMIT! No better. It’s no better and it feels like it’s going to give out. Ok, I’ll make a deal-with whom or what I don’t know, but okay-if the pain isn’t gone or manageable in a mile I will walk.
24) Girl, did you not run in those shorts before you decided to wear them today? I’ve watched you pick them out of your ass now every 10 seconds for the last 3 miles.
25) This is not bad…okay…my pace is decent…I might not suck as much as I thought I would, but I still have no clue what my overall time is. But considering I have all these issues, and it’s windy as hell, I might not be doing as badly as I thought I was doing.
26) Okay…I lied! I lied-I feel like death right now. Only about a mile or so to go, but I feel like hell. I can’t do this…I have to walk…oh wait…no…HEY!!!! My running coach/friend/main support person! You’re finished and THERE YOU ARE! YES! RUN WITH ME, Paul!
27) Oh thank God.
28) This still sucks…can’t do it…it hurts…
29) Okay, finish line up this hill, this big hill- and around the corner. I’m almost there. I can do this…I’m gonna speed up now. Power up this hill…head down, don’t think-don’t feel-just go.
30) There’s the finish! Get through it! Don’t alter course, keep a straight line, just go. GO, GO, GO! DONE! FINISHED! Going to die now.
So, those were some of the many thoughts going through my head. I would love to hear what some of the thoughts from your last race were. What goes thorough your head as you’re racing?